The primary school teacher admitted to fatally stabbing her boyfriend denies the murder charge as the prosecution closes at Northampton Crown Court.
Fiona Beal, 49, Year 6 teacher, of Moore Street took to the stand for the first time in her trial for the murder of her boyfriend of 17 years, Nicholas Billingham, 42.
Beal openly told the court that she accepted killing him in November 2021, as well as burying his body in their garden, but denied the charge of murder becausse of her mental state at the time.
The prosecution argue that Billingham was a victim of a premeditated murder, planned in Beal's diary, describing it as her "chilling confession."
Northamptonshire Police discovered her journals after finding the teacher in critical condition in a suicide attempt while she was on holiday in Cumbria.
Beal claims of her husband's aggresive and abusive behaviour, including spitting and threatening her during sex as well as throwing plates at walls, 'wore her down' until what the defence described as: "broken."
When asked by her barrister, KC Andrew Wheeler, about her memory of the incident, she said: "I don't remember a lot of the detail.
"I don't remember much at all about when it actually happened or the months afterwards."
She had lured her boyfriend to bed for sex, blindfolding him with hidden intentions before taking a knife to his neck while he was unaware.
The court heard how she wrapped his body in a bed sheet with plastic bags and zip ties, before burying him under bark chippings.
Sharing more on the stand, Beal told the jury her past with her partner as well as his controlling behaviour.
Stating when he met him 2004 he was 'very caring' and 'attentive' but changed overtime in "small incremental steps..."
"I couldn't tell you when it started, it just got worse and lasted until the end."
Beal revealed how Billingham would belittle her over small instances, particularly cleaning around the house: "Everything had to be exactly how he wanted it."
"He was more obsessive, If he thought I hadn't cleaned the bathroom tiles properly he would take me to the bathroom and teach me the correct way or demonstrate how I would do it. Supervising me, closely, over my shoulder."
She went further about his demanding nature: "if one aspect wasn't right he would throw the dinner in the bin. Or if I hadn't heated the plate he would refuse to eat things...
"Things had to be facing outwards in the cupboard...He expected it to be ready when he got back from work or around the five o'clock time. He'd question why it wasn't, if Id been out or something. There were a couple of occasions where he threw the plate of dinner at the wall.
"I left the house. I came back and it was still there and cleaned it up...
"I lost a lot of confidence."
Prosecution Steven Perian KC argued that instead of leaving her cruel partner, she devised a plot to kill Billingham and even further planned how to get away with it, creating alibis and excuses.
She had written prior to killing her long-term partner of her plans, which was obtained by Northamptonshire Police found her in critical health after attempting suicide when her family reported concerns for her wellbeing,
This led to the police discovering Billingham's body over four-months later from his burial, in which his body was mummified to the point where they needed to use dental records for identification.
Defence barrister Mr Wheeler countered earlier in the trial that the charges to be dropped to manslaughter due to Beal's 'broken' mental state at the time.
The trial continues...
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